This week's question comes from Cami:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
My question is how do you learn to trust again? My heart has been closed to trusting others because I’ve been through so much pain. I’ve shut down and I know I don’t want to be this way, but I find it so difficult to open up and trust. It always feels unsafe. How do I get over the fear of getting hurt if I have no support system to hold my hand while I heal myself?"
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Dear Cami,
We feel for you. It can be difficult to open yourself up again after experiencing a lot of painful situations. We understand the desire to shut down.
The place to start is with your own healing. It would be too
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How Do I Get My Expectations Met?
This week's question comes from Tiffany:
Hey Orna and Matthew, I have a quick question about expectations. I know that one should have a "no expectations" attitude towards those they love (family, friends, partners, etc.), but how do you distinguish expectations from standards and requirements?
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Dear Tiffany,
Great question! Let's just get right to it. Expectations are desires that are not expressed. We expect our man to be able to anticipate our needs. We expect our family to be supportive. We expect our close friends to be there when we need them. And then all of them at one time disappoint us. Expectations are the cause of so much suffering in
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Does Being Too Masculine Limit My Success In Love?
This week's question comes from Joanie:
Dear Orna and Matthew,
I am a highly educated woman and I work mostly with men as I am an engineer. I have spent the majority of my adult life really working hard to establish myself in a field ruled by men, and I’ve been very successful in that part of my life.
Now that I’ve been reading your emails and watching your videos I’m starting to understand why I haven’t been able to maintain a great love relationship. I guess you could say I have overly-developed my masculine side at the expense of my feminine.
When you speak about feminine energy being receptive I must be honest, I’m a bit lost. You say that it’s not
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Relationship ready men?
This week's question comes from Loretta:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’m a very active, fit, professional 49 year old woman. I seem to be attracted to younger men and them to me (I look younger than I am). The problem is they only want sex, and are not looking for a relationship. How can I meet someone I’m attracted to that would be interested in having a long-term relationship?
My longest relationship was for 13 years. He was the love of my life and my children’s father but he passed away in 2000. I remarried and was in that relationship for 10 years, which ended abruptly with him moving to another country.
I have now been single for 5 years. Which I am grateful
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How Many Licks Does It Take…
This week's question comes from Janet:
Hello Orna and Matthew,
I’ve been reading your emails for a couple years now and I guess it’s time that I write you to gain some clarity. I’m highly educated, successful (I work in medical field) – I feel like I have everything in my life that I want… except my guy.
The concept you share about your love imprint has really stuck with me and I have really thought deeply about where I’m at and I just can’t seem to get a grasp on what my blocks are.
Recently, I had an ugly break up with a really great guy. I really thought things were going well, he pursued me at the beginning, and it seems that things changed a few
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Where Are the Spiritual Men?
This week's question comes from Sarah:
Dear Orna and Matthew,
I've done a lot of personal growth and think it is an important part of who I am in the world. And yet most of the guys I meet (including my ex-husband) are NOT interested in growing and changing. I want to share my life with someone who wants to grow with me! Do guys like that even exist?
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Dear Sarah,
Yes, there are plenty of men who are interested in personal growth. One thing you want to be sure of is that you haven't made the decision that there are not men who are. If you have decided that, then you will continue to find evidence of that being true. It's a funny thing that we really
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