This week's question comes from Sandi:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
I really love the dating advice you give and hope, hope, hope that you can help me!
I just seem to be attracted to jerks and I’m sick of it. I’ve stopped dating altogether and have resigned myself to just being alone until I can figure this out.
My ex-husband was just mean to me in so many ways. He’d make fun of me or call me names. He had a nickname for me that was so not nice or sweet or kind! Always complained about my weight, etc.
I finally woke up and got rid of him, but since then all the men I’ve dated reveal themselves to be jerks at some point. They are demeaning, critical, selfish, and
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Dating After Divorce
Why can’t I make love last?
This week's question comes from Leslie:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’m lucky in that I have no trouble getting dates or even finding men who want to be in a relationship with me. In fact, one of my friends brags that I could get just about any man to propose to me.
BUT… I can’t ever seem to make it last. I’ve been divorced for 10 years, have been proposed to by at least 7 men, and I am constantly dating.
I’m reaching out to you two because I never seem to find the “right” man. Either they are controlling and we fight like crazy, or the spark between us doesn’t last. I feel like I get bored so easily with them.
How do I find someone who I can grow
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The Problem Is NOT Women Or Men
This week's questions comes from HollyAnn:
"Hello Orna and Matthew,
Please help!
I’ve been dating for the last 2 years since my divorce and I feel so frustrated with the whole experience.
I always seem to meet men who I date for a couple of months then they unexpectedly break up with me. They seemed to be interested then they disappear. I am never able to form a bond with them. They don’t give it a chance.
Seriously, do MEN ever want anything even close to what women desire? And why don’t men ever try to give women what we need? Women are constantly available emotionally so why are men consistently unavailable and somehow it’s a woman’s fault?
This
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Sacrificing your happiness for someone else’s comfort?
This week's question comes from Rheena:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
I hope you can help me. I am 58, relatively attractive, healthy, really interesting and smart – everyone in my family are nice people, my children, my siblings, my parents, all of us really nice people. I've been divorced 5 years and I recently ran into my ex at a close friend’s daughter’s wedding (we were her godparents when we were together so we were both invited to the wedding).
I knew he had remarried, but I had never met his new wife. Everything I heard about her had me confused. My children say that she is completely different than me. That she seems to push my ex-husband around and is super
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How Do I Get Him to Change?
This week's question comes from Suzanne:
"Dear Orna and Matthew,
I am a faithful reader of all your information you send out and follow all your advice. I have read The Soulmate Shortcut™ several times. So here is my situation in a nutshell.
I am 51 years old divorced 8 years was married for 27. I have had a best male friend my whole life since we were 15 years old. We have been each other’s rock and constant through out life. Dated in high school, college, after college, right after our divorces, and are presently now. We have always had a strong bond and connection with each other like no one else in our lives. The connection is there physically, spiritually, and
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How do I learn to trust again?
This week's question comes from Cami:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
My question is how do you learn to trust again? My heart has been closed to trusting others because I’ve been through so much pain. I’ve shut down and I know I don’t want to be this way, but I find it so difficult to open up and trust. It always feels unsafe. How do I get over the fear of getting hurt if I have no support system to hold my hand while I heal myself?"
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Dear Cami,
We feel for you. It can be difficult to open yourself up again after experiencing a lot of painful situations. We understand the desire to shut down.
The place to start is with your own healing. It would be too
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