This week's question comes from Kimberley:
Orna and Matthew,
I have been reading your weekly Love Notes for a few years now and I think I’m getting clearer on why my marriage did not work, and what I can do differently.
The problem for me is that most men I’m attracted to are much younger than me (by at least a decade and more), and they are players. I know they are not looking for a relationship. The men around my age are nice men, but I just don’t find them attractive.
My dad was a very attractive man who I now know was a womanizer. He wasn’t much for settling down and my parents divorced when I was very young. This must be part of my love blueprint and why
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Overcome Self Sabotage
Is Your Picker Broken?
This week's question comes from Susan:
Hello Orna and Matthew,
I have been getting your emails ever since I subscribed last month after I purchased The Soulmate Shortcut™. It's a great book, thank you so much for writing it.
I still worry though. My friend and I are in our 30s and feel the same. We keep only ever attracting the wrong men, who seem great in the beginning only to let us down in the end.
My last relationship was with a guy who was so romantic, he proposed to me. He was really focused on our relationship. However, he was trying to turn me into what he wanted me to be rather than appreciating me for who I am. He had no interest in me as a person and
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Won’t love just happen when I’m ready?
This week's question comes from Monalisa:
Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’m wondering if you think one has to look for love, or it will come when you are ready? Is it like work on yourself so you can allow it to find you, or do you have to actively go out there and look and try things?
I think you give the best dating advice for women and so I’m super curious how you will respond. Please pick my question to answer.
All the best!
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Hi Monalisa,
Thank you for your question – and because you asked us to pick you – we did!
Love does not magically happen when someone is "ready." Just like the dishwasher will not magically fix itself one day, or world peace
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I lose myself in my relationships…
This week's question comes from Andrea:
Hi Orna and Matthew,
I really love your advice for women who are getting over their divorce. I was finally able to get out of an unhealthy marriage when I discovered my voice and started asking for what I wanted. It turns out he didn’t like that.
I’ve been doing a lot of work on myself and I’ve discovered my pattern but I don’t know what to do from here.
I have a tendency to be a rescuer in my relationships. Because of this I become more involved in my partner's life and I lose myself and what I'm about. Could you please suggest something I can do to avoid this in the future?
Thank you for your insight!
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Dear
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What if it’s not meant to be?
This week's question comes from Annie:
Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’m really struggling right now and I hope you can help me. I know that I am attracted to unavailable men. I ended my most recent relationship because I constantly wanted more from him… more time, more attention. I want to feel like I am a priority, and well, I didn’t. So now it’s over.
After giving it a good cry and some time, I started online dating again. Nothing happening there either… just feeling icky and I’m really starting to wonder if a great love relationship was just not meant to be for me.
What are your thoughts?
Trying not to lose hope.
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Hi Annie,
Thank you for your
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How do I meet a quality man?
This week's question comes from Rhonda:
Hello Orna and Matthew,
I have a question for you.
I am a 49-year-old female who has been divorced for a year and a half. I was in a 22-year marriage that had more downs than ups. I tried to make it work...I stuck with it, probably for too long, but when I left I was ready and have not looked back. I harbor no ill will towards my ex. I recognize the fact that I went through what I went through in order to make me the person that I am today.
I have done a lot of internal work...have figured out what I want and what I don't want for my next relationship.
My problem is that I am having a very hard time meeting
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