This week's question comes from Jocelyn:
“Dear Orna and Matthew,
I always seem to meet men who I date for a couple of months then unexpectedly break up with me. I never find a connection with these men. They seemed to be interested… then they disappear. I am never able to form a bond with them. They don’t give it a chance.
What am I doing wrong?”
Thanks for your question. What’s interesting about what you shared with us is that you don’t seem very interested in these men that you’ve been dating. If you’re not forming a bond with them, then they are doing you a favor by ending it.
You did not share a whole lot with us, so it’s difficult for us to know if you’re doing something to turn these men off. What we do know is that if you’re not very interested in them, there is no reason for them to continue dating you.
A man who wants a relationship with you will pursue you for a relationship.
It is the role of the man to lead and drive the relationship forward.
As the woman, it is important to share what you desire and make requests of the guys you date.
When you show up as the real authentic you and share with a man what you want, you’re showing him how he can win with you.
A man who wants a relationship with you will want to know how to win your heart.
You will discover through the dating process how a man responds to your requests. If he doesn’t follow through on honoring your requests he is clearly not a match for you.
Most men today are confused – they don’t know what you want. Do they offer to pay for the date, or see if you want to pay? Or split the check? Do they open the door for you, or will you take offense if they try?
Attraction and even deep love does not come with mind-reading powers. It’s very important that from the beginning you speak up about what you desire.
The way you come across in the email you sent us doesn’t tell us much about you and doesn’t share anything about what you want in a relationship, or the kind of man you are looking for.
It is imperative that you have a vision of what you want in relationship. Then you can evaluate through the dating process if a particular man matches the vision of what you desire.
In the dating process, it is just as important to DESELECT someone who is not a good match for you as it is to select someone to be exclusive with and discover more.
If you’re not being picky about who you commit to, then you are setting yourself up for disappointment, and will likely only date someone for a short period of time.
Once YOU are clear on what you really want, then you can date with purpose.
We created a program that will illuminate what it is you REALLY want in a relationship. This is very different than making a list of qualities of the guy you’re looking for – this is about your True Soul Partnership so you are clear on the dynamic you desire in your intimate relationship.
Your Soulmate Blueprint® brings into focus the qualities of your ideal relationship so that you can discover through the dating process who is a values match to you and who is not.
We call this program – Your Soulmate Blueprint® because it walks you through the steps of designing your soulmate relationship.
It’s 100% digital so you do not have to wait for anything to be shipped – and the best part is that it access the world’s most powerful computer – your brain – to do the work for you!
The best part is that Your Soulmate Blueprint® is 100% digital, so you can order it today and get started right away – even it’s 2:00am.
Let’s bring clarity to your dating so you can date on purpose. Order Your Soulmate Blueprint today.
Love and Abundance,