One of the most common questions we get from our clients is how will they know when they meet their soulmate, as if there will be some lightening bolt that will strike them and the heavens will part and a clear signal will be delivered. The truth is when a man truly loves you it will be obvious and you’ll know that a soul connection is possible.
So instead of spending all of your energy looking for the hidden signs that your guy is ready for the next level, relax and trust that it will be clear to you what his intentions are by his actions.
Of course you could Google “How to Get A Man To Marry You” where you’ll get over 22 million results with titles like:
“How to Get a Man to Marry You: 10 Steps to Get that Sparkler”
“15 Psychological Tricks To Make Him Propose”
“50 Things That Make A Man Want To Marry You”
Psychological manipulation is not an effective way to create long-lasting love. The majority of men are quite obvious if you pay attention to their behavior.
He will pursue you for a relationship.
There is a natural dynamic between the masculine and the feminine that has been lost in our rush to equality. Men and women are equal but they are not the same.
Men are hard wired to be efficient. He will put as much effort into something as is necessary to complete the task and nothing more. If a man sees that someone else is putting forth the effort, he will relax and allow that person to take care of it. This comes from their biology. A man can only make more testosterone when he is doing nothing.
If a woman puts all the effort into the dating process by pursuing and setting up dates the man will relax and let her. Only the very rare man would give up companionship and regular sex with a woman who he finds attractive and is doing all the work for him.
However, when a man is ready for a relationship he will go on a mission to find his woman. He will drive the relationship forward and he won’t be subtle about it, it will be obvious what his intentions are. He will look to find ways to please you, he will set up dates, and he will go out of his way to do so. He will let you know how he feels with both his words and his actions.
In this way, a man who truly loves you will do what it takes to get a commitment from you and take you off the market. He will introduce you to his friends and family. He will make a clear request for exclusivity.
He will want to please you.
A man who truly loves you will want to know how to please you. He will be paying attention to what you say, what you like and dislike, and he will take note of things you’ve mentioned in passing, like your favorite wine, hobbies you enjoy, and the type of music you like.
If you make requests he will do his best to take actions to honor them. He will want to win your heart.
Your happiness is important to him. He wants to know that he is the one that can make you happy, not some other man. Deep down inside he knows that your happiness will lead to his happiness.
When there is miscommunication, or a bump along the way he will want to reconnect with you and make an effort to clear things up. He will want to know what you need and want from him.
Let a man know how he can please you and observe how he responds. Does he make an effort to fulfill your request? Or does he argue with you and make little effort to comply with your query? His response will tell you everything you need to know about how seriously he is invested in you and the relationship.
He will plan a future with you in it.
Making plans in the future with you is a sure way to know that a man is falling for you.
If the man you’re dating is talking about taking you to a concert three months from now, or is planning a trip for the two of you, then you can know that he sees you in his future. Is he asking you about taking time off so you can go away together in advance? Then you can bet that he is interested in a long-term relationship.
Some men like to keep things loose and flexible. This is a clear indication that he is not seeing you in his future. He’s focused on right now and looking to get his immediate needs met. If he’s reaching out last minute, you may want to take a closer look at his behavior because rather than spontaneity it may mean he is looking for something convenient – not long term.
When a man makes plans for the two of you, he is letting you know that he is invested in a future with you.
He will claim you.
When a man knows you’re the one for him, he will want to make sure you’re not seeing other people. He will ask for exclusivity.
If a man you’re dating is rushing toward exclusivity, you may want to put it off for a bit by telling him you’re not ready yet. Many men (especially middle-aged men) are used to being a relationship and don’t like to be alone.
When a man is looking to claim you, you don’t have to jump at the opportunity, you can delay exclusivity. This will ensure that he wants a relationship with YOU rather than just any relationship. The right man for you will be patient and will honor your timeline and requests that you make.
Leaving sex out of the equation until there is exclusivity helps you see his intentions clearly. A man who is interested in a long-term relationship with you will honor your request to delay sex as long as he knows you are interested in him and simply not ready to take that step.
If you are constantly guessing what his intentions are and whether or not he is the man for you, then it is time to take a step back and see if he steps forward to claim you. A man who really wants to be with you will make sure that no other man will get there before him.
He doesn’t need you to change.
If a man is asking you to behave differently, or to change your appearance for him, then he is letting you know that he is trying to fit you into a vision of what he wants and isn’t necessarily seeing the real authentic you. Is he uncomfortable with the way you handle conflict with other people in your life? Does he complain about how you communicate with your family?
A man who truly loves you won’t ask you to change, he’ll value your authenticity.
We all want to be loved for who we really are and on some level we’re terrified to show up as who we really are.
Be brave enough in the pursuit of soul-satisfying, long-lasting love to embrace all the parts of you and show them as needed. You don’t need to hide behind some mask of perfection. As a human being you are perfectly-imperfect and your beloved will cherish all the parts of you – the good, bad, and the ugly.
It’s better to know early on that he can’t take the heat of your bright light. Shine your authentic self brightly every step of the way and you will find that the right man will not only stick around, he will be the man you can depend on as sure as you know the sun will rise tomorrow.
You can be sure you have a soul connection with a man when he isn’t constantly expecting you to be different. He will love and accept you for who you are.
He will be willing to work through conflict with you.
Many women shy away from conflict (especially early in the dating process) because they don’t want to scare a man away. They bite their tongue so they can attempt to go with the flow and be easygoing.
Knowing that you can navigate through conflict together is an important discovery and part of what the dating process must include. Additionally, unspoken conflicts build up pressure inside of you until you can’t hold them in any longer and you can end up exploding like a volcano.
Also, unspoken conflicts can create distance between you and a man who truly loves you. The only way out is through and when you have a soul connection you can work through the conflicts that arise and become stronger together.
When you are willing to be authentic with how you feel and take responsibility for your triggers and wounds, then you can see conflict as a doorway to creating a deeper connection.
When a man truly loves you he will be willing to work through any conflict with you so that the two of you grow even closer. He won’t see conflict as a sign that the two of you are not meant to be. Instead he will see it as an opportunity to discover what you really want and need.
He will love the parts of you that others left you for.
If you’re rolling your eyes right now in disbelief that this exists we share this from our own experience.
Are you tired of being told you are opinionated or too strong? Frustrated that your kindness is seen as a weakness? Or sick of being told that your ambition has to take a back seat to his?
The right man will see your intensity as passion. He will see your determination and tenacity as a positive. He will treasure your authenticity because he won’t have to wonder what is going on with you.
A man who truly loves you will see your unique personality as the exact thing he is looking for. Instead of making assumptions about what he may or may not want, or like about you simply express what you think and feel. He will find those parts of you that others have criticized you for the most loveable.
Stop searching for the secret hidden meaning in a man’s behavior. If you are not sure what he wants then he probably doesn’t know either. Trying to convince him to step up and claim you will only leave you exhausted and cynical about true love.
Relax and let a man pursue you. He will reveal his intentions and take action to drive the relationship forward. You’ll never have to wonder if he truly loves you. You’ll get to experience what it is like to be cherished by a man.
Are you frustrated with online dating or think that there are no men to date where you live? Join us for a complimentary Soulmate Strategy Session and we can share with you the steps to create the soul connection you desire.