This week’s question comes from Kerri:
“Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’ve been following you two for years and I love watching you interact with each other. The love between you is so clear and not like anything I’ve ever seen especially after being together for so many years. I didn’t have good role models when it comes to relationships – it seems that both of my parents have had a hobby of collecting marriages.
Do you believe that Love At First Sight Exists?
I’ve recently met a fellow who I feel so attracted to and safe with and he is moving things forward quickly. I have doubts in my head – can I trust him? Is this real?
What do you think? Can we know “The One” at first sight?”
Thank you for your sweet comments about us, and our relationship. We believe that you can make the relationship of your dreams a reality, so let’s see if answering your question can bring you closer to creating the love you want.
Love at first sight is something that we see as an OPPORTUNITY.
The person you have the spark of attraction with triggers your subconscious mind to signal your conscious self to recognize – THIS IS FAMILIAR!
Most people misinterpret this signal and go all in with a complete stranger!
When it comes to love it’s best to look before you leap. If this person is your life partner, then there is plenty of time to be in discovery of who he is and if he is a match for you over the long term.
The Romance Stage of relationship is intoxicating – it is a chemical high as powerful as heroin. It’s important not to make any life-changing decisions in this stage.
Dating is meant to be a process, and it’s done best when you’re dating multiple people at the same time so you can discover about yourself as well as what drives you in relationship.
If you’ve never experienced the love that you desire – when the right guy shows up it will feel like nothing you’ve ever experienced before. The feeling will ground you, you may simply feel curious about him. It won’t be like a schoolgirl crush where you think about him day and night. The intensity of attraction will be there but it won’t come with anxiety, or obsessive thoughts.
While it can be intoxicating when a man feels so certain about you, it doesn’t mean that you have to move as fast as he would like. You can request that things slow down.
You are the prize! Don’t agree to anything (exclusivity, travel together, commitment, etc.) until you feel ready. It needs to be what we call, “A Full Body Yes,” or it’s a No.
Observe his behavior when you make an effort to slow things down. Does he support you or does he get impatient? Does he pressure you or does he respect your boundaries and requests?
When we get caught up in the emotions of infatuation and attraction it can seem romantic to dive right in. We always wonder what the rush is all about.
If you’re worried that this guy will move along to someone else if you don’t take him up on his offer to settle down with him now – that is a sign that this is NOT the right guy for you.
There is no expiration date on your Beloved.
Our suggestion is that you start using the mantra, “This or better.” When you think about this man say to yourself, “This or better.” Meaning that if it isn’t him, that you’ll create lasting love with someone even better.
This man is not a unicorn. We don’t have just one Beloved. You aren’t doomed if for some reason this relationship doesn’t work out.
Practicing non-attachment will allow you to see him for who he really is.
The Romance Stage in the beginning distorts our interpretation of a man’s behavior – inflating his positive qualities and dismissing his negative ones. When you allow yourself to detach from the need to know if he is “The One” or not, the pressure is off and there is no need to move quickly.
We both felt a strong connection on our first date and looking backwards after over a decade together, it seems we both knew we had found someone special. We still waited 2 years to get married.
If part of your pattern in relationship is rushing in and being unsure if the guy is the right guy for you, our digital program Your Soulmate Blueprint® will assist you in creating a crystal clear vision of your ideal relationship.
Just like on an old-fashioned camera where you’d have to manually turn the dial to bring the lens into focus, this program walks you through creating the vision so you can know with zero doubt whether a man is a match for you.
Your Soulmate Blueprint® works with your subconscious mind so you can utilize all the parts of you to craft the vision of your True Soul Partnership bringing your conscious and subconscious mind into alignment.
Too many people are clear on what they do not want in a relationship and continue to struggle to have the love they want because one cannot create from lack. Knowing what you do not want doesn’t help you – instead it creates a pattern of continuing to draw in the kind of man you’re certain is not for you.
If you’re looking to manifest a Beloved, or simply to evaluate the guy you’re currently dating to know if he’s the right match, Your Soulmate Blueprint® is the program that will help you do just that.
Order Your Soulmate Blueprint® here – and because it’s digital, you can get started immediately – even if it’s 3:30am.
We are here to be your guides to long-lasting love!
Love and Abundance,