This week's question comes from Sheila:
Thank you. I know that's the answer yet I just don't know how! That lack of truly understanding how is what cages me in, blocking me from having the self-confidence to be open to the possibility of love. Having been soooo devastated by actions of primary relationship (parents) that it destroyed my marriage. My resentment and inner rage, and the guilt and shame I clothe myself in, keeps me lonely and hungry for love. I want out of my cage into life's freedom.
Thank you for hearing me!
We know that you didn’t actually send in a traditional question as you responded to one of our recent Love Notes Weekly emails. Just so our entire community can track along with you, the subject of the email you responded to was: Can I find lasting love at my age?
The desire to answer your question is so strong that we want to shout it from the rooftops. What you ask is HOW and you clearly stated that you are looking for UNDERSTANDING.
What we want to share with you is that neither of these things will get you what you desire. Knowing HOW and having more INFORMATION will never ever lead to the transformation that you are looking for.
Two weeks ago we hosted our live coaching workshop, Getting It Right This Time in Los Angeles and one of the great benefits was that many of the women in the room experienced true TRANSFORMATION!
These women shared with us with tears in their eyes on Sunday how they had permanently changed and that the trajectory of their lives had forever changed.
That kind of change does not occur from having understanding. We use this example often: When you read a diet book, at the end of the book do you weigh any less? No, of course not!
Self-confidence is a word often thrown around by popular Dating Coaches who show people how to manipulate their behavior to appear a certain way to appeal to a certain kind of man.
True self-confidence comes from feeling comfortable in your own skin. It comes from the inner knowing that regardless of what curve balls are thrown at you in life, that you will be okay. It is generated from having a healthy positive inner dialog with yourself (rather than berating yourself and speaking to yourself harshly).
When you have a TRANSFORMATION you can change in a moment. Once you have an experience your entire being cannot deny the experience. So if you have the experience of self-love, you automatically love yourself more – ALWAYS. When you experience someone being kind and loving to you (even when you have made a mistake) you cannot suddenly pretend that the experience did not occur.
You state that you have these strong emotions that are keeping you prisoner. That is true.
Think about the Law Of Attraction – it is the emotion that is the rudder on your boat and will guide you to the destination.
What most people do not understand is you cannot lie to yourself. So you cannot “fake” thinking about something positively… well, you can do that, but it won’t bring you any closer to what it is you want. You’re just wasting time attempting to lie yourself into believing something.
The only way out of the cage that you are currently in is three-fold:
- Release the negative emotions from past events.
- Change your inner dialog from negative to positive.
- Have a shift in your behavior to be more in alignment with the Truth of who you are.
We outline these steps over and over, time and time again, and we understand that it may appear simple, but it is just not easy to do these things. Even with our guidance it can be challenging to stay the course.
It’s just not likely that one can make these changes alone. There is too much resistance to release what is known. Even if you are miserable and unhappy, there is a familiarity in that discomfort. A part of you does not know who you would be without the misery, without the negative self-talk, and without the struggle.
We know without ever speaking with you, without ever meeting you that the Truth of who you are is love. That you don’t need to prove anything, do anything, show anything to earn the love that is your birthright. You came into the world as every other child did – as the human embodiment of the energy of love.
Coaching with us, we bring our clients into alignment with this truth. We have a proven system and track record that allows our clients to raise the level at which they value themselves allowing them to bring in a beloved relationship.
You will connect with your beloved on the path to your highest and best self. This deep inner work leap-frogs you forward on that path.
If you’re ready, willing, and able to be part of the 3% who want to live consciously and create soul-satisfying, long-lasting love then we are the coaches for you! Sign-up for a Your Love Imprint® Session with us so we can connect with you directly, determine Your Love Imprint and outline for you any next steps based on your available resources.
Let us assure you of this: The love you seek is inside of you.
We don’t give our clients anything they don’t have; we simply give them access to parts of themselves that they have been closed off from. Stepping out of the “cage” that you say you are in will require that you take ACTION.
Let that action be speaking with us directly so we can get to know you. A Your Love Imprint® Session allows us to give you dedicated time so we can share with you what is right for you (we don’t do anything cookie-cutter). Sessions are available via telephone or skype so if you reside outside the U.S. we make it as easy as possible.
Click here now: www.YourLoveImprint.com and take the first step toward freedom.
We are here to be your guides to love!
Love and Abundance,