This week's question comes from Suzanne:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
My question is:
What would be the most important thing to do for yourself if you have that “no needs” complex due to having grown up in an alcoholic family?
Thank you very much and I hope you choose to answer my question because I really think you two care about your community and give the best dating advice."
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Hi Suzanne,
Thank you for your question and we completely understand that with the set of circumstances you grew up with in your family of origin that you learned to get by without having your needs met and to sacrifice for the needs of others.
The first step is the most
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Love On Purpose Blog
How can I be more visible?
This week's question comes from Niveen:
"Dear Orna and Matthew,
I do believe that Creating Love On Purpose® is the only way to attract what you need. My biggest problem in love is the men I feel that I deserve I seem invisible to them.
I am very visible in my work and socially but in love I feel I get pushed aside. I am ready to be visible to the men I deserve and to take a leap of faith to good men. I just need guidance.
Thank you."
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Dear Niveen,
We’re so glad to hear you are on board with the idea of Creating Love On Purpose®! We know from the experience we’ve had with thousands of women over the last 8+ years that this is the most effective way
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The myth of “Accidental Love”
This week's question comes from Brenda:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
I’ve been reading your newsletter for a while and I hear what you are saying about working on love and I’m skeptical. Won’t I just meet the right guy? Won't things just work out for me when I meet him?
That’s how it’s worked for most of my friends. They were single, or struggling, until they met Mr. Right. So I’m a bit confused what you mean about love strategies… would you please clarify? I am 37 and I really do want to share my life with someone and so far that hasn’t worked for me. I don’t see any patterns, all the guys I’ve dated are all very different.
Can you help me?"
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Hi
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How do I find my blind spots?
This week's question comes from Yala:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
Thank you for answering questions, I really think you give the best dating advice. I am an attractive 33 year old woman and I have never had a serious relationship before; just meaningless or meaningful only for me sex. I am looking for a partner that I am sexually attracted to, its not like it has to be Mr. Universe but I DO HAVE TO FIND HIM ATTRACTIVE not in a butterflies way but generally handsome and suitable.
Here is the catch, I was looking at my history and it seems that every guy that I am attracted to barely looks at me or barely even notices me, while all the ugly ones seem pursue me.
I
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Is the desire for perfection keeping you from love?
This week's question comes from Bonnie:
Hi Orna and Matthew,
I love your weekly notes; I look forward to reading them every week. I really think you give the best dating advice. I’m not exactly sure of my question; I have been married and divorced now a long time. I have a successful business that I built from the ground up, yet and I can’t seem to figure things out in my love life.
My friends say I’m too picky and I don’t think that I am… I just don’t want to settle because I’ve been down that road before when I got married rather young and I don’t want to go through another divorce.
I know that I drive myself very hard. I have always done that. I was a
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No one gets a spiritual by-pass…
This week's question comes from Yvonne:
"Hi Orna and Matthew!
I love your weekly Love Notes! They are so inspiring. Thanks for this opportunity to get your advice. I do have a question.
How can I stay with appreciation and value for myself and for the other person even when I’m triggered? I know my core wound is about my worth and not feeling valued. How do I stay open-hearted for my own good, and give this man the opportunity to win with me?
I do my best to stay positive and not let my triggered feelings to get in the way, but sometimes I can’t help it. I feel so bad when I act out this way.
And if he's not able to win with me, let him go... so this or
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