This week's question comes from Clare:
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
Thank you so much for all your work on the subject of love. I read your notes regularly and have been working on my blocks for some years now. I have recognized some of my dating patterns and have become more conscious of my feelings.
3 months ago I met a wonderful guy. A connection we both cherished and appreciated. However in the last week there seems to be a shift. We've had little 'discussions' about household chores: he's very set in his ways and I have spoken about this and he is aware of it. He is positive with this and says we need to evolve together as we are learning about each other.
I
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Topic: Heal Your Heart
Why do victims of abuse choose abusers?
This week's question comes from CJ:
"Hi! I want to know if you can help me understand something. Why is it that being abused in your life helps you choose people that have abusive tendencies? And how do you get yourself to a place where you can find happiness and comfort?"
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Dear CJ,
Thank you for coming forward to ask for help in understanding why this happens. We learn to receive love at a very young age. And as we grow older how we learned to receive love becomes what our subconscious mind identifies as “love.”
The subconscious doesn’t have the ability to judge, it simply identifies what is Known and what is Unknown.
When we are raised in an
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How do I move on from a cheater?
This week's question comes from Patricia:
Hi Orna and Matthew,
Your Newsletter is such a blessing to me. You give the best dating advice. Thank you and God bless you for all the great work you do.
My question is how do you move on when you have loved someone for years and he has left me again (the 4th time). I am a forgiving person and always make excuses for his cheating behavior. I am 55 years old and sometimes I feel I cannot find anyone now. Also he was my first boyfriend 30 years ago. After my first husband died, he came back in my life. Sorry for writing so much but I want you to understand how much I am attached to him.
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Dear Patricia,
Thank
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Feeling stuck… Where do I begin?
This week's question comes from Susan
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
Thanks so much for all the work you do and for your optimism and support.
At the moment I feel like I have just completely and totally given up hope at all, and even decided I'd be better off on my own, so much to the point that I am now so isolated that I'm scared to go anywhere. I've never been the most social of people anyway and have social anxiety which doesn't help, but this is now ridiculous. I haven't even been seeing my friends.
My last relationship was with a full-blown narcissist who was only with me to get his needs met. It was so horribly hurtful, confusing and draining. It was also very
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Why am I stuck and still alone?
This week's question comes from Eileen
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
Thanks much for your Love On Purpose Revolution®. I am learning some great tips. But frankly, I am tired of seeking, I feel incapable of really getting it, when I try to use the advice it feels unnatural and contrived, even manipulative, and I am feeling hopeless.
I am 7th of 11 children, while it was fun with all those siblings, my parents were busy and unavailable emotionally. I was married for 20 years, with 2 girls, but communication was not great and it got abusive at the end.
I have been on a spiritual path since then, another 20 years now. I tried everything, The Work, Now, Dyer, Secret, ACIM,
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How do I get out of my masculine to let a man in?
This week's question comes from Maggie
"Hi Orna and Matthew,
A couple of years ago I met a lovely man who I managed to turn into a similar version of all the other men I met, I am very much in my masculine, had a bad abusive relationship with my dad, tried my hardest to be the opposite of everything he wanted of me to defy him and turned into the perfect woman with totally male perspective, I raced motorbikes, did a physical man’s job, etc. everything, but I still attracted men, as I am attractive physically etc. But always ended up with the loser who couldn't look after himself and ended up being nasty and critical to me, because I had basically emasculated him by
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